5/9/12

the fine line between dreaming and letting it go

Last night I watched the finale of the The Voice. The last ten minutes were TV at it's finest as the winner, Jermaine Paul, was announced. After an emotional speech given amidst falling confetti, Jermaine embraced his wife while singing a very stirring rendition of "I Believe I Can Fly". 


We cheered for a variety of reasons. Something about those kind of shows, (The Voice, American Idol, etc.) is so gripping as you watch someone achieve a dream that they have long stalked.


And it got me to thinking that dreaming is a fickle thing. If the dream is successful (winning The Voice, making it on Broadway, selling your book, getting into med school, owning your own business) then the sacrifices made seem noble and ever so worth it. 


But what about when the dream is long in coming, or, dare I say it, doesn't come at all?


At what point do you just let it go? Where is the breaking point, the place where you decide, "I will stop making sacrifices for this and just accept that it will always only be a dream."


I think more like this ever since a small word document labelled 'manuscript'
 began to grow on my hard drive. I've never invested so much energy or time in something that was such an unsure thing. At first it was fun to write, fun to share, fun to develop. But somewhere along the way it changed from a little story on my hard drive to a 140 page book that isn't finished but begs to be shared.


In the midst of this new dream is a new appreciation of Christ. He has made me to be creative, gives me a well of life to draw from and a reserve of grace for the days when nothing comes. And I can't help but feel that it's OK to dream and yet that my dream doesn't really matter- in a good way. Should it go nowhere, I will be no less loved, less cherished, less accepted. 


And if it does go somewhere...well, that is the great adventure at the end of a dream, isn't it? Where could this lead? What new things could be beyond? Can I earn enough as a writer to hire a maid? If I were to lay it all on the line and put myself out there for the world to read, if I nurture and prune this pile of words, could a message come out that might bring laughter and grace and life to someone else?


That's really the dream. That what we have to offer (as a writer or an artist or a singer or a friend) might actually be significant to someone else. 


My advice?


Dream on. Dream big. Don't be afraid to chase those dreams a little. I think the hunt is good for the soul. And if I do reach a point where I have to let the dream of my novel fly away, I know I will be disappointed to see it go, but hope I will be exhilarated from the chase. 

2 comments:

Nicole @ she-laughs said...

I say dream and dream big. :)

Becky said...

Thanks, Nicole. So fun to have a friend who's a fellow dreamer.